LOVE

Ways to keep a Man Interested

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Here are some quick, actionable hints and tricks for keeping a man interested. Note, this may be helpful, but if you are different, maybe other things could help.

1

Keep him intrigued. If he likes what he knows so far, he’ll make sure to come around more often to find out more. Don’t be a completely open book, unless that’s who you are naturally. Give the relationship time to simmer, and space out some of your revelations so that you still have the ability to surprise him. Maintain a little bit of mystery. Don’t tell him every little thing you’re doing, every place you’ve been to, every person you’ve seen. Even if you didn’twant to be a little mysterious, sharing every little detail about your past and your whereabouts is likely to be draining to a man.

Keep some surprises up your sleeve. Being hunters, explorers, and daredevils, men naturally love surprises. If you schedule a surprise — going skydiving, for example, or a cruise — don’t be afraid to just whisk him away and not tell him about it until he’s right in the thick of it.

2

Find out what he likes. Everyone likes to talk about themselves. It’s a natural fact of life. Instead of dwelling on you and your past relationships, ask him questions that show him you are interested in him. If you get him going about his past and his experiences — and can stand sitting through the occasional boring story — he’ll feel like he’s connected with you and has a bigger bond to build on.If he likes a certain color, it wouldn’t hurt to wear that color every once in a while. If he likes a certain food, it wouldn’t hurt to surprise him with lunch or dinner.

Most of our communities are increasingly pluralistic with people from numerous different cultural and ethnic backgrounds. If he is of a different culture from you try as much as you can to read and know a thing or two about his heritage. He will love that.In other words, pamper him a little bit. Women loved to be pampered, but so do men. They’re just afraid to ask for it for fear of not seeming “manly”. Remember, don’t coddle or mother him, but do record his favorite TV shows, get him tickets to a game (he can invite his buddies if you don’t want to go), or get him that razor he’s been talking about. It shouldn’t go unnoticed.

3

Find the balance between independence and making sure he’s loved. Guys are naturally independent, meaning they need a little more space than most women do. Make sure he feels like he has a life outside of you. As much as he likes you, nothing pains him more than to look at his life and realize that he’s lost touch with his friends and no longer gets the respect for wearing the pants, so to speak. Give him space some of the time.And if you’re worried about trust, don’t be. Trust him. If he gives you a reasonnot to trust him, then you can start questioning his motives. The truth is that if you trust him and he likes you, he won’t want to give you a reason to revoke that trust. If you don’t trust him when you should, he’ll want to punish you for not trusting him.

4

Make him feel like a man. There’s nothing wrong with boosting a man’s ego. It makes him feel good about himself and if he feels good about himself because of a certain someone, he’ll want to keep her around. More than likely, he’ll also return the favor.Reinforce the way he wants to be viewed. Does he consider himself anathlete? Tell him how muscular, coordinated, or skilled he is. Does he consider himself an intellectual? Tell him how smart and profound he is. Does he consider himself a comedian? Laugh at his jokes and set him up to be funny.Let him be chivalrous. Pay attention to all the “gentlemanly” things he does for you and acknowledge them. When he opens the door, pays for your meal, or lets you in first, make him feel special! Know that he’ll most likely act different around his guy friends. Never tolerate outright disrespect, but if he acts a little strange, it’s because he’s trying to impress his boys. If it doesn’t offend you, let him.

5

Keep public displays of affection to a minimum. Men don’t necessarily like to be forced into holding your hand in public. If he does anyway, that’s a bonus, and he’s probably a very decent guy. If not, don’t try to make him. Don’t be upset or angry if he feels awkward about doing it; males are closed-off creatures and don’t like to show their ‘soft sides’ to the public.If you need a man who is comfortable showing his love to you in public, tell him gently. Let him know it’s a priority to you, but that you understand it might not be a top priority for him. If he really likes or loves you, he’ll be open to compromise.

6

Be confident and look great. He prefers you to other girls, so show you’re proud of yourself! And when it comes to looking great, know your guy. Some guys are attracted to natural beauty; others like a spray tan and eyelashes. Either way, dress to show that you’re comfortable and confident with your body but make sure you don’t go over the top.Don’t compare yourself to other women. Not even in a way that seems acceptable. To a guy, this comparison screams “insecurity,” and the guy is suddenly worried that he might have to be your psychologist instead of your boyfriend.

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